One Smile. :)

Does anyone really care?

Those everyday problems we all meet as teenagers, insecurities, parents, stress. And then you really think if there is anyone feeling the same way, having those exact same questions. Well I guess there will probably be many teenagers having such problems, and I guess we all need a shoulder to lean on. Many people probably would have a solution to that. "Get a boyfriend!" They would say. Well yea, I guess to some extent, it would help to have someone by your side when you're feeling down. But hey, don't many relationships end up breaking both parties heart? And even if most couples would disagree, what about those singles? Does that mean they'll have to suffer in their own thoughts and feelings?

I used to, well I still do, suffer from these problems. I had too many responsibilities pushed to me, and my parents were not supportive in the things I love. I also hated myself and suffered from a hell lot of insecurities. At one point it got so serious that I did things that I regret. All these things was because I thought too little of myself, and also did not want to burden others.

Okay, now when you read till here, I might look like I'm some friendless loser. Well, no. Infact I had plenty of friends. There were so many people who seemed to care for me, some which I shared my problems with. But as my thoughts and stress got into me, I pushed people away. Not physically, but mentally, without even knowing it. My mind told me that those people don't actually care for me. They just text me and asked about my problems because they thought they had to, beacause they were put to be in charge of me. Even if it doesn't seem to be the case, my mind would make up excuses for their care, and I would feel so down, and empty.

Empty. Emptiness. The feeling like there's no hope, no happiness. When you just wanna lie on your bed. When you just wanna so badly tell someone. That feeling sucks.

A few years ago, when I was younger, I used to think that people who cut themselves and do all those stupid shit were losers. Well now I understand. Sometimes your thoughts consume you, and you cry till you cannot take it anymore. That's what happens. Those losers I once mocked seem to appear so strong. Well, not exactly. They are probably struggling.

So where are those people when we need them? One text. One hug. One smile. Might just be what these broken hearts need.